Bill Dunbar makes this observation:

Something bothered me about Brits comparing sexual consent to serving tea. I finally got it down in words...


Great Britain: Hey China, I want some tea.

China: Ummm...okay, I'll fix it for you-

Great Britain: No, I want to buy your tea and sell it myself.

China: I don't think so.

Great Britain: I'm selling your daughter opium and whoring her out until you see it my way.

China: Son of a Bitch! Get out of my house!

Great Britian: My army says dibs on the guest room.

China: How much silver is it going to take to make you gwai lo lay off?

Great Britain: A lot. And the tea.

China: long as I grow the tea.

Great Britain: Hey India. I snagged some tea from China. Can I grow it in your yard?

India: I don't really use the stuff much, but I guess so...

Great Britain: I'm going to need your bedroom. And your daughter.

India: Son of a Bitch!

Great Britain: God, how I love tea and imperialism!

Great Britain: You colonies, you all love the mother country, yes? You love tea, yes? Well, since you can only trade with your mother, Mother has decided you will pay for the new curtains here at home. Mother is taxing your tea.

The Thirteen Colonies: What curtains? Shouldn't we get a say if you want us to help pay for things? We're family, for chrissakes, not some drunk you roll in an alley.

Great Britain: Lie still and think of England.

The Thirteen Colonies: No more tea. Buy your own damn curtains, Ma.

Great Britain: No tea?!? That's...unBritish!

The Thirteen Colonies: Bingo!

British and Hessian troops: Ma says you owe her some dough. Pay up before we have to get rough.

The Thirteen Colonies: Tell Ma this is my house. Coffee from now on. And I'm having French girls over, too.